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View Full Version : How to get flame-based! (Humor)


Carl
30th June 2001, 09:47.25 PM
As some of you may know, I fritter away time over at Yahoo Horseplayers United, where we essentially talk trash, pick a few horses and insult each other.

I just got nailed by one of our newer members (maybe, we also clone over there) and thought I would pass it on.

They all know I use HTR and bust me for it, but this is the best one I have been flamed with yet, so I am passing it on for your entertainment. I post there as Sql_Squirrel/Peep.
==============================================

...............HTR Headqaurters...........

1313 Mockingbird Lane
Washington, D.C.
The desk of Zen Massa,
HTR King

Dear ___sql squirrel____,

This is to inform you that I have some good news and I have some bad news.

The bad news is, you are hereby being tossed from our group unceremoniously for the reasons given below.

The good news is we, as an organization that prides ourselves on taking the high road at all times, don't have to put up with your sorry a$$ anymore.

We have tried so hard as a group to ease you out, however you just can't take a hint. First, we haven't responded to your posts on our BBS. Second, we paid your wife off with Eskimo Bars to delay you a week in your arrival to Las Vegas.

That was my idea. I'll be damned YOU'RE riding in my limo, and drinking MY expensive booze!

Those 2 things didn't work so I had to take drastic measures. I had a horse's head placed on the pillow next to you in bed in your hotel room, which I thought would be the dead giveaway that we wanted you to use Formulator2. But that didn't work either.

Instead, you felt the horse's head in the dark, stroked it, and said "Honey! You finally took off all that makeup after ten years! You haven't turned me on this much since the dumpster experiment we had!"

So, desperate times calls for measured calculations. We have to let you go. You've been post nothing but losing days on the net and we can't have that here. We have a reputation to uphold.

Speaking of the high road.....you could smoke 5 J's, drive on top of the road itself and not know the meaning of "high raod." What an embarrassment you've turned out to be.

I hope this missive doesn't find you in the dark alleys of Ontario, in those clown shoes of yours, looking into trash cans for half-eaten sandwiches. The welfare system over there is much too attractive for someone of your skills (or lack thereof).

In closing, please feel free to continue to check in on the successes of your former HTR breathren as we win contest after contest. Don't let the fact that you hacen't won squat with the same data get you TOO depressed.

Ciao baby,
Zen
=============================================

Wicked bunch over there, that's for sure!

later,
Carl

Glen
1st July 2001, 08:35.20 AM
Good comedy carl, you got scortched on that one.

MikeDee
1st July 2001, 10:16.11 AM
I think the guys over there have to much time on their hands!

Carl
1st July 2001, 10:32.24 AM
Yeah too much time for sure.

Most of the old flamers just call each other names ("numbnuts", "jerk" and "A__hole" are the commonest) but we have a couple of new posters who like to do works of art such as above. Pretty amazing stuff.

We have one new poster who calls herself/himself "da Kat 21" who I personally think really is PA's problem child Kat. (You have to be there to know why I wouldn't know for sure. Clones are everywhere.) She/he posted a link to the e-mails PA sent her and they look pretty genuine.

But, to quote George's favorite horse ($15.60, better put that guy on stable mail!) " YOU NEVER KNOW". And I don't.

later,
Carl

hurrikane
1st July 2001, 09:42.11 PM
I"m just curious...does anyone over there ever talk about horse racing?

Carl
1st July 2001, 10:42.47 PM
Hurrikane,

We used to talk horses/horseplaying, but we don't really have a lot in common.

Most of the guys there use "final time" or some variation there of. Don't interest me any, I think it is over bet.

What I do does not interest them.

And on top of that we have Plankie to contend with. If you would have been at PA's a year ago you would have known what that was like, he was the prime reason PA went to a registration system. In the middle of any (and every) thread he would jump in with a "Now people......you numbnuts....here's how......"

Don't do much for serious communication, but for funnin' works fine.

later,
Carl

hurrikane
2nd July 2001, 06:40.15 AM
you have a point Carl....there are not many, if any, boards where people talk horses. Part of the reason I ended up here.

Butch
3rd July 2001, 05:19.02 AM
I read some of the posts over there. Who is frankkatus? He's hilarious, even if a bit bent.

MikeDee
3rd July 2001, 06:28.43 AM
could someone post the link to that group?

thanks

hurrikane
3rd July 2001, 06:37.51 AM
It's agaist my better judgement but here you go Mike. Don't stay too long..the Surgeon General has determined this site to be hazardous to your health.



http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/horseplayersunited

George
3rd July 2001, 06:48.52 AM
Hurrikane is right. Not a place to spend time on. Once you figure out there are only five or six posters there it becomes funnier. They all have clone id's and answer their own posts. Interesting how harsh they can be to themselves!!

The personality? that calls itself frank/kat/frankatus/kat-2001 is truely demented and I suspect dangerous.

Carl
3rd July 2001, 07:34.08 PM
Aw come on guys don't be so hard on my (second) favorite site. You make me feel guilty.

I feel like a guy who likes to hang out at strip bars and has been caught by the church deacons. Well yeah Yahoo is trash, garbage etc. So is National Inquirer, Boobs/beer, Survivor and whatever else. (What can I say, guess I am just a 5CL type claimer, still eligible for non-winners of three lifetime.)

later,
Carl/Sql_squirrel

Glen
3rd July 2001, 08:20.43 PM
I just look at it as a place where horseplayers go to talk smack and let off steam...Any horse talk is by accident...But it does go way over my head w/ many of those post...Lots of back history and inside jokes I guess.